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Monday, March 27, 2017

PUSSY CAT, PUSSY CAT, WHERE ARE YOU?

Hello everyone! I have now put comment approval because of the number of spams flooding my posts ... one of the old posts had 150 spam comments! I got tired of deleting. Thanks for your understanding. 

I opened my window one early morning last week and I saw a black cat sitting on the fence ... I smiled and said 'HEL-LOO! As I walked away, I was grinning widely 😀 and thinking, 'is it me, Nitty, that just greeted a cat, without putting on my 'Armour', brandishing my 'Sword' and invoking fire and brimstone on it, especially a black one? Wetin yankee don do to me ooo? CHAI! If it were in 9ja, that cat is as good as gone! It would have been pelted with stone or stick or water! 

I don't like cats. In Nigeria, many believe, including me, that it is a medium for evil. Movies, confessions and testimonies of people, made me more wary of them! SO! I was surprised one day, as I walked towards my car, I saw a black cat beside it! EHEN! 'WHO SENT YOU?' TELL THEM SAY, YOU NO SEE ME O! I shouted at it! I was praying as I was driving. SO! To my surprise, many weeks later, I was at the backyard playing with my boys, when this same black cat came over and went directly to one of my sons who was sitting on the grass, and he was cuddling and rubbing it's body, and the cat was loving it. 'STOP IT!' GET UP!' I screamed! But I no gree near the cat sha!






'It's okay mummy, it's Elijah's cat', my son replied. As if on a cue, this cat came to my feet and rubbed itself against me ... ME-HN ... if you see the way, I stood still eh-en. 'Pet it mummy', my son said, laughing when he saw my reaction. Pet wetin? WHOSAI! I moved away, this cat still followed me as if it was on a mission oo. Is it by force? SHOOIR, I no want! FOR WHERE? It came to lie down by my feet, where I sat on the children's slide. 'Touch it mummy, touch it'. My son cajoled me ... reluctantly with shaking hands I touched its fur, oh my goodnessss, it was so softttt, it came closer, I stroked it few times and was giggling with excitement 😄... it came out unexpectedly o. Hmm, trust kids now ... next thing I heard; 'Mum, can I have a cat as a pet?' 'NO WAY!' I exclaimed! E neva reach that level abeg!



Few weeks later, Elijah, came under the pouring rain to tell us it had given birth to a litter of kittens. HA! Na so, my boys go greet the new mama o, when the rain came to a drizzle. I was wondering, if I should buy gift sef? 😃 One of the kittens is white in colour, it comes out to play anytime it sees my kids coming in or going out. Last week, It heard my voice from the window,and it came towards me, I was talking to it through the window, I knew it wanted to be petted, but I couldn't, instead, I took a picture of it. Yesterday, my brother-in-law and his family came to visit, when all the kids were playing at the backyard, the white cat came out to join them. The same thoughts I had earlier about cats in Nigeria, that was what they were discussing, saying, this cat was lucky it was not in 9ja ... so my guys, that was how, I got over my phobia for cats o!

I wonder if some of you have cat-phobia as I did?
Have a fulfilled week ahead.

Thursday, March 16, 2017

WHY WIVES FIGHT MISTRESSES?

Many times, wives are asked; 'Why fight your husband's mistress, why not your husband? 'Did she asked your husband to have an affair with her?' Whenever I come across such comments from women, I am wrought to ask ; 'Why do husbands fight their wife's' lover when caught huh? IMO, they are tress-passers, and we know tress-passers are never welcomed! And who say wives don't deal with their way-ward husbands huh? You don't live with them, do you? Straying wives are sent packing, but way-ward husbands are forgiven, because, whether we like to admit it or not ... it's the man's world, since they are the ones that marry women, and can marry many wives as they want, according to our culture and their religion! 



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The adulterous men say they are in it for the sex, while the mistresses say, it is for the money. BUT! These mistresses soon fall in love with the men because of the way they spend on them and their 'maturity' at handling situations! BUT! Many of these wicked men deprive their family needs to take care of their mistresses, also leaving their nasty personality at home, while showing their awesomeness to their mistresses who are no longer content with being the 2nd fiddle! THEY WANT IT ALL! So, they begin to scheme on how to overthrow the lady of the manor! Some go fetish, some use sexual prowess and some  food, to tie the man down, after finding the weakness of the wives from the diarrhea infected mouths of their lovers! When wives complain, people will say; No husband can be stolen unless he wants to be taken, in the first place! And you know what? They are kind of right! Simply because these men will tell their mistresses that they were forced to marry their wives, or are not in love with their wives or their wives are old or ugly or dirty or don't know how to f***! 

There is always the fly on the wall, that goes buzzing to the wives! Or the wives develop detective skills overnight, and find out things by herself. If many wives show you some of the things these mistresses write to their way-ward married lovers, you will be ashamed on their behalf! I read one, where the mistress was begging her lover to divorce his wife, that she loves him so much and she was ready to take care of his children! What of a mistress swearing brimstone and fire on her married lover when she found out he slept with another girl? I also saw the naked picture of a lady sitting on a chair with her legs wide apart showing what her mama gave to her! I heard she got married about 2 years ago, and still asks her ex-married lover for money! And yes, we do have a good laugh!

We have heard many stories of way-ward husbands coming back to their senses after years of neglecting or abandoning their families for their mistresses, and people still ask , 'Why fight the mistresses?  For the simple reason that;  after wives have turned to prayer warrior, a fashion-guru, a chef,and become an acrobatic in the bedroom, for their husbands to be faithful to them, the mistresses don't want to let go, because of the MONEY! And you expect wives to fold hands akimbo and be looking abi? WHOSAI! Some crazy wives will go spiritual or physical on them! Werey, pass werey!


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The summary of it all is that ... it hurts and it is a reflex action to lash out at anything or anybody causing that hurt! In fairness to all mistresses, some way-ward married men, lie about their marital status. Many Nigerian men no longer wear their wedding rings, or takes it off when going 'hunting'. Many are good at keeping it from any web-search, and when the ladies find out, it will be too late because they are already deep into the relationship to let go! Shame on such irresponsible husbands! And some ladies no send sef, if a man is married or not! Wetin concern agbero with overload?! Money for hand, back for ground! 


What behooves me is the way, single and married ladies who are/were in adulterous relationships in the past or present boast about it and laughs at karma as a piece of mythical bull s***! And they ask, 'why karma don't visit adulterous men?' And I always reply; Who told you, it does not?


Friday, March 10, 2017

I AM A SAINT!

HEAR! HEAR! HEAR!

I am now a saint!

SHIOR! How come?

Yes oo, I am now a MRS! 

E-HEN! Tell me something!

I will oo, ko easy rara! {it's not easy}.

SO! What happened to the days of 'frolicking; with married men?

Oh! Please! Those are yester-years, now I am a new being!

I see! Just like that? Because you now have a ring?

Abeg! Let me hear word! You better pass me? Abi you married as a virgin?

At least I did not share it with a married man!

Sin is sin jor! Who thief, who kill, all na the same thing!

 Not so oo, karma will come visiting you!

I hear! It is only women address karma know abi? Men nko?#yimu#

It's the man's world, they make the rules!

If karma will visit me, it means I was the other woman's karma!

It does not work like that, many women don't have fish brains!

You are now abusing me? Is it your body? Who made you a judge?#hiss#

No, oo. Just saying that, for a single lady to give her virginity to a married man and have several abortions for him, she has cotton wool for a brain! 

LISTEN! If you know, you don't have anything good to say or congratulate me on my new acquired status, kindly keep that mouth of yours shut!

HA! It is you that is cussing me now o. If you know your conscience is clear, why go on the defensive? All I know is that when your own husband starts being a generous donor to other ladies, don't  grind your teeth out of anger or send sob stories to social platforms, simply take it in your stride.

Please, just carry your self-righteousness out of my sight! It takes 2 to tango!

Who told you the married men don't get burnt by their actions? Don't women pass another man's child to them? Don't they eat food cooked with menstrual blood for them? Don't their own wives cheat on them? Don't they drink water used for washing the vagina first thing in the morning? Don't they stop progressing in their business and career? Don't they become lonely and neglected by their children and wives at old age? Just that every married woman's worst nightmare is the 'other woman', because we know what our fellow specie can do to lasso a man down if he is loaded in his pockets and below the belt.

Hissss, all these epistle for what nau? Karma no dey look face? Virgins that have way-ward husbands nko? Do they deserve it?

Is cheating only physical? Emotional cheating nko?  Collecting money from a married man meant for his children's school fees or family feeding is equally wrong! As you said, karma no dey look face? Mistresses no dey fear face? Witch pass witch o!

Abeg, abeg, Ms sanctimonious, carry your wahala dey go. I serve a merciful God. Afterall the thieves on the cross still made heaven at the last hour! Make I go meet my circle of saints o jare!

SMH! Will women ever learn? They are always left with the towel hanging!  SIGH!

Saturday, March 04, 2017

NETFLIX

A comedian once made a joke about the people who rate movies in Netflix; He cannot imagine someone that can only afford $8.99 a month, rating movies, 2 stars? 3 stars? Well, it was a show organised by Netflix, so it made a good laugh. But it is from jokes your friends will tell you, who you are or what they think about you. I like and enjoy Netflix a lot, because of no advertisements, and their movies are well picked. I usually select comedies and foreign movies, it is there I understood the jibe the comedian made ... foreign movies get 2-3 stars especially Africa movies!


source. 2 THUMBS UP


I applaud Netflix for adding Nigeria films amongst their selection. The first time I saw it, I was so excited and watched all, and  always searched for 'recently added' movies, and I found one today, which I am watching right now ; ' Onye Ozi' ... Okey Bakassi is not disappointing me at all. My first time watching an Igbo movie, the only little comma I have is that, the white actors should have spoken English, the Igbo no flow at all 😃. It is said, we should give honour to whom it is due and when it is due, so I won't hesitate to hail Nollywood for improving because I am not a big fan of our movies. But, after watching the likes of Irapada, Figurine, Mr&Mrs, October Ist and The wedding party recently in You tube, ( the food scene was hilarious but knowing how Nigerian wedding parties are, especially for  the rich, the amala , gbegiri and ewedu with assorted meat looked 'poor 😄 ), I salute our producers and wish Netflix will be adding more of these well scripted movies. I grew up as a Bollywood fan, but as I became older, I got tired of the 21/2 hours long movies ... the songs and the new 'modern-whats-not', I liked the traditionally setting more.


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I am happy that some Nolly wood movies don't have several parts again! And no long boring dialogues and exaggerated scenes! The movie has ended ...rated it 4 . BTW, What does Onye Ozi means sef? That is how I watch Indian movies without knowing the meaning of the titles! 😄 Ok, guys, see you later...going back to bed, leaving for work in the next few hours. Talking of work, a co-worker jokingly said, all normal people ought to be asleep by 3.00am! AHAHAHA.

Have a fulfilled week ahead.