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Monday, February 15, 2016

HOW TO SURVIVE IN BLOGSVILLE...BARING IT ALL!

Okay my readers, if you plan to open a blog , here are few survival tips, I have gathered from my ...wait, ....counting my fingers....from oct 2009-present day...hmm... that is about 7 years combining my old and new blog together. So, I have gathered experience ba? I wish I had a mentor to teach me all these in my naive days. 

source


Rule #1! Be a ass-licker! Yep! You heaar me alright! Learn to be a yes-man to every blog you visit if you want the gesture to be reciprocated! Abi, you don't want them to visit your new blog and comment also? It is a give and take situation. You scratch my back, I scratch yours. SHIKENAH.


Rule#2, If the blogger's post pisses you off, because of your ass licking, you cannot say otherwise, you have another avenue to vent your anger! Simply go to a blog you know the blogger visits often and go anonymous to cuss him/her out! What best place, than an entertainment blog, where over thousands of anonymous visits! OH! Don't feel guilty, because 100% of bloggers do that! You can take that fact to the bank and cash it out! And don't argue with anyone who says otherwise, just say, 'you don hear!' And keep quiet on controversial topics like religion, sexuality and hair.


Rule#3, Allow anonymous comments in your new blog, so that you can go anonymous too and comment as many times as you want to attract others to comment and make your blog look as if people visit it often! Afterall, the agama lizard nods it's head to praise itself, when nobody does, for jumping from the wall to the ground! And when other anonymouses cusses you out, don't start breathing fire and brimstone from your nostrils, wasting your energy and time trying to trace IP addresses, because you ain't no saint either! Simply SUCK IT UP, and give back as good as you get! 


Rule#4, Embellish your stories very well, to get a lot of awws, and green-eyes from your readers. Flowery stories get to people. Many like burying their heads in the sand like the ostrich...hear  and see no evil! So live out your imagination and fantasy on your blog! Afterall you are anonymous...or are you not? OOPS! Then you will get busted! OUCH! ... So, rule #1 ought to be, you should be anonymous!

Rule #5, Find out which cliche you belong to and  let your presence be felt. You see, there is the married group, spinster group, working women group, housewives group, student groups, diaspora group, fashion group, and gossip group....oh, don't forget the I-am- the-very-religious-group. Find the one that works for you. Yes! I forgot the I-am-the pretentious-evasive-group. 

Remember, there are no permanent friends but permanent foes in blogsville! Play your card well, to get your new blog noticed. #Winks#

P.s To all the visitors (not readers)  that come to read my posts and comments in other blogs, and go anonymous to cuss me out in the entertainment blog I visit, PLEASEEEE, be creative for once! I am getting bored with cusses that deciphers my size, looks, status and age! Abegyy, no be today fowl yansh dey back!

P.S.S, I will put this post on schedule so I don't delete it,as I have done to many drafts in the past, because I am so done with lies and politics in blogsville!
Drafted.feb 3rd.

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