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Tuesday, March 10, 2015


I laughed so hard while listening to this video! The guy was ranting about 9ja people back home who squanders money sent to them to build house or do business. He is really pained! Which he ought to be!   


3 weeks ago, a friend called my hubby and suggested to him to send money to buy land and start to build a house. Hubby thanked him and said,he was not interested. He didn't know, we already have a property before we relocated. I told hubby that, even, if, we have not built a house, I will not support him sending a dime! More-over, we arrived here in 2012! 2012! My people o! So, why is this kind of talk coming up? That was how someone suggested to us, to be sending cars. Hubby laughed, and told the person, we were just 2 years old in the country then! A guy we know, is ruined, because all the cars he bought and shipped to 9ja, he did not get his money back! He is regretting, bitterly! That was how a friend in 9ja threatened, a guy in yankee to stop disturbing him for his money, after selling the car he sent. Objectively speaking, I don't blame my people back home, but the Diasporas that flaunt all fakeness on the media, and exaggerate every thing! The same person said, a friend's brother that left within a year, sent in a car! Really? Good for them! Dem no go tell pipo the truth o

I find it ludicrous for one to be living in a tiny apartment, depriving oneself of comfort, and be sending money home to build a mansion! I am sorry! It's a warped sense of thinking! Many Diasporas do so, because, they don't consider abroad as their home! Believing anything can happen! And some want to build a house for their parents to reflect the new acquired status of a diaspora!  Heck! Not for me! 

This mentality by some Nigerians back home, that, they must enjoy the milk and honey that flows from across the seas by force by fire is so annoying! Because, they have no idea, what Diasporas go through to send that money! It is the tax return season, many are either sending the money back home or traveling to build their houses, especially now that the exchange rate is high! Laudable! But some of them have bad credits or  will start jumping from pillar to post to pay their bills later! Is it not a penny wise and pound foolish approach huh?

A lady worked her a$$  off sending money back home to her sibling to build a house for her. This sibling would send pictures of the various stages of completion. She visited  9ja unannounced, and got the shock of her life! The building was still at it's lintel level! 20 years of her labour in yankee, all gone! Where would she start from? Whom can she trust if her own younger brother can swindle her?  A student in jand was working around the clock, sending money home to help his parents build a house. He had no savings, because there were plenty of jobs to do, so no problemo! Then the global recession hit! No more extra jobs! He had only one job to keep body and soul together. He could not pay his school fees or rent or bills anymore or renew his visa! He was evicted from his apartment, stopped from his classes, could not fend for himself, his father stopped building his house, he eventually moved in with his girlfriend, and lives in fear! If he had saved all those monies, would he have been in such a dilemma?

LISTEN! I am not against having an invest back home either for you or your parents. All I am saying is that, one should apply wisdom! If you know, your stay abroad is not certain, by all means, invest all you have back home. But if your stay is assured, I see no reason for investing heavily back home when you know, this is the country you have sworn allegiance to and it's now your permanent home! You have started a new generation here! So who are you building the house for? Ok! To generate more income when it's leased out? Money that you won't smell, talkless to see and touch?

Please Diasporans, put your nuclear family first and save for your children education, so that they won't have so much loan to pay back the government after graduation and  save  for your retirement, so you will be well looked after at old age! I believe, where you make your living and have your family is your home!


Toinlicious said...

20years of hard work and nothing to show for it? Fadaludd!

Highly Favored said...

You are a very wise lady to not get sucked into these pressures and to consider that this is where you live and your children's education. Very wise and level headed.

Jay Stan said...

Well said. My best advice is try and bring them over so they can come see what life is like here.

Nitty Gritty said...

Just imagine that Toin! This lady even sponsored his visit to yankee as a sign of appreciation for completing her mansion. This is someone with the same father and mother o! Thanks for visiting.

Nitty Gritty said...

I am blushing o from your compliments.
Thank you very much Favored :D
My hubby says I have a talent for ignoring people!
I will laugh, and say, not really, just that I have learnt that humans can do or survive without a lot of things! We are the ones putting unnecessary pressures on ourselves just to belong or oppress or showoff or control another human! The best legacy is education! Every other one is jara!

Nitty Gritty said...

Thank you Jay.A sound advise.
I observed that when such people come over, they are more strict! Their dime no go fall anyhow! ahahaha.

Nitty Gritty said...


Good Naija Girl said...

Excellent advice, Nitty. My parents have been burned badly by this exact situation of building a house back home.

Nitty-Gritty said...

Thank you very much Jummy and also for sharing your parents experience.

Nitty-Gritty said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
NoLimit said...

Wow!!! People are wicked sha! Shey they think money grows on trees abroad? Totally agree with you, it is important to take care of number one, if you don't, no one will!!!

Jay Stan said...

may be this na the first time wey I no go gree with you 100%.

you know say we be extended family people sha!
why most people dey send money home be say weda we like am or not, we go need dem helep for tins like marriage and oda occasions wey go carry you go back naija.

I understand ya point, and my advice about building house na say you must go back from time to time to see tins with ya own eyes.

and de best pessin to trust about dis mata na usually ya mumsi, she no go eva lie to her own pikin about tins like dat.

anyhow we see am, home na still home.

but we need to shine awa eyes well well.

@ilola said...

Hmm. There are good people and bad people. My mum successfully completed a house for her sister who lives in the US. So I believe it works for some people.

But sha, wickedness get level.

Atilola's World

Okeoghene said...

Yes, there are only good people and bad people. Be wise

Nitty Gritty said...

I always say nobody will help you carry your load. Do so now, that you are strong and able! Thanks for stopping NoLimit.

Nitty Gritty said...

Ha! No problemo my bros. We can always agree to disagree. That makes a discussion more exciting.

As per sending money home to meet simple needs, e different from the mata of building house. If mosie no strong enough to do the wahala of building house, nah her other children she go still call to go around buying the materials and supervising the workers. No how, dem go cheat mosie small..ahahhaha.

True talk, we need to open our eyes wella!

Home to me is where my family is. America is a land of immigrants. When I watched the documentary of how America was built, it occurred to me that many left their home of birth to make a living in the new land. And generations have come and gone and are still here.. Hence, there are Americans of all races. If they all had the mentality of home is home, how will this great country have been created and where it is now?

Nigeria will always be my birth country and where my root can be traced to, but my home is here I make my living with my family.Our country Nigeria is being ravaged by corruption, if the prediction by analyst comes true, it means the country will soon be broken up. Which I sincerely pray against! But if, I say, If, it comes to past Jay, where will you call home?

My parents left their place of birth in Edo state and sojourned to Lagos in the early 70's. I was barely 5 years old then. I consider Lagos as my home rather than Edo. We stayed to be counted during the census because it is in Lagos my parents made their living and built their houses, if they had this mentality of Lagos is not their home, they won't invest in the state but take everything back to Edo, but was their source of income not from Lagos? Was it not Lagos that opened the gate of opportunity for them to live comfortably?

I ask, if America, did not open their gates for immigrants to come into their country, would we be enjoying the goodness of the land? If our home Nigeria is well structured like America, will people be leaving in droves to seek for a better life?

GOD help us come March 28th! I am sincerely praying, for a peaceful election. Amen.
Thank you Jay.

Nitty Gritty said...

Ailola and true...but the question is; How will you know who is good or bad? Is it not after the deed is done? Then the 'had I known talks will begin?' Money always show the true colour of a person.

Yes! Your mum successfully completed a house for her sister because I believe as a fellow woman and a mother she had more empathy than a man! May I ask why didn't her sister contact any male member of the family to help her out?

If you Listened to the short video of less than 5mins, the guy was angry that they spend the money to throw parties for the gfs and do big boy! When we built our house, I knew the stress it involved, So many believe men are in the best position to handle and supervise the workers who are out to cut corners! And men will not be easily cheated as women and get more respect from the men. Atimes, one have to stay on site till dusk to complete an activity to a certain level, which many believe is not safe for a woman. Thus,many diaspora rather contact males over females, except the female has a fore knowledge of building a house, which I believe your mum does.
Thank you both.

Ola LifeTalks said...

Clapped at everything you said, especially the part of people back home must enjoy everything that goes on here. I feel so sorry for that lady sha I would be more than livid.

So many people deserve to read this post, the utter truth couln’t said the last paragraph any better.

Nitty Gritty said...

Ola, thank you for taking out time to read previous posts and commenting in all, also, for your last paragraph.

I have learnt that, everybody have their own burden to carry and nobody will leave her own load on the ground and come and help you carry yours! They will first carry theirs on their head, then assist with one hand to help you carry yours if they have the stamina. So nobody should see giving as a right or obligation, but a privilege.