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Friday, November 28, 2014


Yes o!  I so like Phoenix 'J'! Always dashing me award from left, right and center!  She gave me the liebster award, sisterhood award, now, the sunshine award! Thank
you so much my blog-sistah.

I have to say 11 things about myself and answer the questions from 'J'. I once said much about myself here and here. But it's still fun to talk about oneself again huh? #side-eye to anybody who does not agree#
Here are more things about me you don't know;
i} I am the over-protective type.
ii} I am NOT a competitive person. 
iii} I love dancing! 
iv} I always apologize to anybody who tells me I offend them.
v} I avoid people that talk religiously every second! 
vi} I can always improvise!

vii} I like people that don't pretend! I keep my distance from effizy people.

viii} I don't like horror, futuristic or sci-fic movies. 
ix} I so like turkey and titus fish ehn! 
x} When I like a particular design of cloth or shoe, I buy different colours.
xi} I tease a lot!
OK! Now, to 'J's questions;
1) is there any friend you haven’t spoken to in donkey years? Would you ring them if given the chance. Nope.
2) what’s your thought on the Bill Cosby rape news? I plead the 5th.  
3) bookstore or library? Bookstore.
4) fix it or get a replacement? Fix it.
5) damsel in distress or wonder woman? Wonder woman.
Well friends, daz all about moi! Thank you :D

Thursday, November 27, 2014


Hey! Its thanksgiving day! A well celebrated day in yankee o! Today happens to be my baby's 11th month birthday also! You think, I won't mention it huh? *side-eye*... ahaha. Yep! You guess right ... I am so happy! It's like Christmas here o! Schools are out for a week! The preparation for the upcoming black Friday night is on! My first thanksgiving experience saw me receiving turkey  from new friends I made, and the store I bought my groceries gave free turkey on every $40:00 purchase! I left them all in the freezer for months because I didn't know what to do with them! I later used it to prepare stew o jare! On my 2nd thanksgiving experience, I bought one and baked it as I saw in y-tube ... hmm ...I try small ... ahahaha. Now! This is my 3rd time of celebrating thanksgiving with the people of the land of liberty and the brave! Ye-haw! Oh! Yes! My turkey is slowly baking in the oven as I type.


It's a tradition to say all things one is thankful for. My list is endless because I don't know where and how to start. GOD is too good to I and my family. Thus, I will summarize it chronologically.
LORD, I am thankful:
1}For my parents well-being.I love them so much, and pray for longevity for them.

2}For my siblings;For the bond that exist between us, that can never be broken.

3}For seeing me through my education, NYSC, and jobs.

4}For my marriage;For giving me a caring, gentle and hard-working husband, who  protects me from anybody who dabbles into our business!

5}For my children;You saw me through 5 deliveries and gave me strength to care for them.  And You blessed them all! I am eternally grateful daddy.

6}For bringing I and my family to America;You made me have the last laugh sir! You made us find favour with people, and met us at our hour of need always.

7} And above all, for Your divine protection all over us, fighting our battles for us, Indeed! Our names are written on Your palms and our future are in Your hands.

Be glorified oh Lord! The GOD of Moses, Isaiah and Jeremiah.

Happy thanksgiving! :D

Enjoy again, another of my fav song;

Saturday, November 22, 2014


A lady was introduced to a man by a pastor, since both were legal immigrants and at marriageable age. She was told he is a doctor, and was happy to hook up with him, but after few dates, she found out he was not a practicing doctor in yankee but in 9ja, and does survival job here. Hence, she backed out of the relationship. Of course,
friends of the man, were angry with her, but I wasn't, and simply told them, she knew what she wanted and walked out. After all, a broken engagement is better than a broken marriage abi? Ha! It became an argument o! I said, 'lets put sentiments aside and analysis the situation:

She might have seen what lies ahead, and weighed the pro and cons, and realized she cannot deal, so she let go! You see, as a doctor back home, if he wants to practice here, he has to be re-certified. As a legal immigrant, he can apply for loan/grant and work part-time while doing that. Now, if this lady marries him, the financial burden will fall on her also! Like I always say, everybody came here to seek for greener pastures! It's all about survival! So who wants to carry another person wahala for head?! She might have her own financial obligations back home and money is always the biggest issue in marriage... not infidelity as y'all might think!

I said in an older post that we humans are hypocritical, and of course, many disagreed with me. But I stand on it. I asked them, if the lady happens to be related to them, will they advise her to marry him seeing what might lie ahead? Like I said in my mini-e-book, love is not enough in a relationship, but perseverance. There is a lady here, who is the bread winner of her family back home. She tried to bring her younger sister to hustle with her and reduce the burden on her, but it didn't work out. She also wanted her fiance to relocate, but her family grumbled about it because they have seen him with other babes and they were afraid that if he comes over, he will be dependent on her for a while and be in control of their finances as the head of the family, which will affect the flow of cash to them! Well, their prayers were answered, he was not granted visa also!

I know, some might dislike me for saying all these, but this is the bitter truth! When it comes to choosing a spouse, love alone ain't enough! So many things are put into consideration! Our sentiments most times clouds our thinking; Like what happened to a friend of mine; He was in love with this beautiful lady, whose mother was hell bent against the relationship. My empathy was with the guy and wonder why the lady's mum did not understand they were in love! Eventually, she died after a brief illness and fingers were pointed at her mother. He mourned her and  continued with his life..... years later, as I remember the whole thing, my empathy went to the mother instead, because, I am no longer the 22 year old naive lady who saw the world through rosy-eyes, but an older woman, who knows that, the words; 'I love you', will not put food on the table, or pay rent or school fees or hospital bill! Rather, 'love' will jump out of the window when the quarrels start!

Let me use this opportunity to advise young couples in love, to try and listen to words from the elders. Like I said in my parenting post, every parents wants their child to be an improved version of avoid the same mistakes they made in the past , hence, they might come out sounding harsh. I know, love can block out all rational reasoning, but take a breather and ask why they want you to break off the relationship. Some parents do turn around after explaining their fears away persuasively. While some still remain adamant! Then the child should let go! My advise to parents is that, give cogent or valid reasons for going against your child's choice of spouse. It's not gra-gra, it's simply dialogue! And if the child is adamant on marrying his or her choice, then let it be! I will also admonish parents not to poison their children mind against any of their relatives who was not in support of their union in the first place, because when the children grows older and begins to understand the issues of life, their view might change and GOD forbid, the parents utter any word of disagreement with their  choice of spouse in future, the animosity they felt for that particular relative will be turned on them!

Monday, November 17, 2014


A big thank you to everyone who subscribed to my mini e-book. I
explained in my previous post that Jummy, the Good Naija Girl, encouraged me to write an e-book, because I have so much to say on some issues, but summarize so as not to have long posts. 

I know, time is of the essence to everybody and  we relax whenever chance we get with a book. Hence, I made my first free e- book very easy to read without losing the message.

All credits go to Good Naija Girl, for editing, formatting and designing the e-book. She is a knowledgeable lady. My main e -book is on relocating, which  I am working on and will be out next year. It's a detailed guide-book to help legal immigrants who are relocating to settle down quickly without stress.

Thank you.
Happy thanksgiving in advance :D

Saturday, November 08, 2014


Hello, my friends, I believe many of you have seen the recent changes in my blog huh? All these changes came about, at the hands of a kind blogger, who took her time to educate and encourage me more on blogging tips, and to be active on face-book. She designed the Fb logo!

She started by telling me that, Nitty-gritty is a brand, that many still knows me by that name, I then, remember, Honey dame said; 'I will always be her Nitty!' And I should get a domain, because my blog, do give out valuable information on, housekeeping, parenting and especially on relocating, so hubby got a domain for me. That was what Phoenix 'J' noticed 2 weeks ago when she clicked on my   old newdawn40.blogspsot and she was redirected to

The next thing she said, saw me running and hiding under the table, but she pulled me out with her sweet words and convinced me I have so much to say on issues, but to avoid so long a post, I summarized them, so why don't I put it into an e-book! Again, I remember, many have told me in the past, I should write a book, I simply grinned and shyly walked away, because I didn't think, I have what it takes to be a writer. My typos were enough, to discourage anybody from reading sef! She agreed to bear the pain of reading my first draft. And oh boy! Did she make so many corrections! I salute her for not cringing when reading o! And she designed the cover page! Isn't she so talented?

I was really surprised to hear from her for the first time, because, before I deleted my old blog, I was not a regular visitor to her blog, and I have never communicated with her in any form, that is why, I am overwhelmed with this show of love from her, which made me to understand  Abiola's love letter the more.  She said, she is overwhelmed with my thankfulness and, appreciates my appreciation. Ha! She does not know me o! I am the type that can greet 10x for a good deed, and her kindness is a virtue that is not common in a competitive world.

It's said, honour should be given to whom it is due, and be thankful for every good deed done at night, so the doer can perform a bigger one in the morning! Thus, to Jummy, the Good Niaja Girl, I say another big thank you, for everything! And to every giving you gave,  a good measure, will be pressed down, shaken together, and running over you, in Jesus Name. AMEN! E-HUG.
Have a fulfilled week ahead everyone.

Tuesday, November 04, 2014


I was surprised when I found out on my arrival that,  there was no washing and drying machine inside many of the apartments, but laundromats. #see me that washed with my hands in 9ja, before hubby bought washing machine for our 10th anniversary,  am not serious o jare!# Jokes apart though, my expectations were high. I was told if I buy the machines and installed, the management would charge me extra for water. Ok! I went to find out the cost of both machines and installation, lets just say, the total cost brought me down to reality with a crashing sound! So, off to laundromat I waka go jor!

This is one of the small machines, see those flags up there? No 9ja flag there o! But other Africa countries dey!

Laundromats are within walking distances of some residential buildings, so if you don't drive, you can push a trolley. The residential complex I stay have 2 laundromats within, I don't use them because, I have to pay with card and it's not economical for my large family. The laundromat, is a place to observe different characters; Like one lady I noticed; She only brings in 2 pieces of clothing for washing and she wears gloves to handle them! Yep! It's her clothes alright, because she puts them on immediately after drying.

Laundry is  good business here! Clothes are pampered with different products, and carefully folded into perfect squares.  Even undies sef, dem fold! SHIOR! But some don't bother to fold, they put all their dried clothes into a new garbage bag. As for me, I simply go, 1, 2, 3, 4.... fiam! ...into the basket! I don't have the patience of these women  who will stretch it out on the table, fold the garters to get the crisp edges, then smooth it ,that it looks ironized. {coining my own word :) So, one day, I decided to copy their method..... ..nobody told me to stop, when my waist began to hurt and I was spending more than 2 hours in the laundromat. #my pickins would do it @ home o jare!#
One has to know how to manage money in the laundromat, or else, it would go down the drain! My first time, I put too much coins into the dryer, that the owner was magnanimous enough to refund back some of my money. Imagine me putting $15 in a dryer! I was not used to the currency then, I was just slotting it in, thinking the more the coins, the hotter and faster it would be. #chei! maths I no kukukma sabi!# A quarter is for 10 minutes drying.

I lost lot of quarters on laundry until I got the hang of it by learning from other women. Now,I spend $5 less for my weekly washing.  I told hubby that any apartment we move to in future MUST have washing and drying machines because on bad weather days, we cannot move out, and some days we are so busy, and the clothes will  pile up.There is nowhere to dry them even if I wash with my hands in the bath tub!

Pillows drying in the dryer
Pillows, sneakers, foot-mats, and rugs are also washed and dried in these machines! As long as it can fit into the machines, it is washable! At first, I was uncomfortable with it, imagining the type of germs that would be in the machines, but I was assured, there was none. Some people bring along anti-bacteria spray to disinfect inside the washing machine first before use. I don't blame them, because on few instances, soiled clothes from  homes and lodges were brought there. because  their personal machines developed fault. 

see that rug for washing?
When back home, I washed my bed-sheets every week because of heat, now I do every 2 weeks because we don't sweat. I washed my towels every 2 weeks back home because I could dry them in the sun, but here every week, because I dry them indoors. I wash the blankets every 3 weeks. Washing pillows, was a new tip I came to learn here. Back home, I dried the pillows under the sun, and when the covering-cloth becomes old, I loose it, pour out the fillings on a mat to dry under the sun, then throwaway the old clothing, find an old pillow-case and stuff it with the well dried fillings, then sew it back. If you are good at hand-stitching, do it or call 'obioma' [free-lance tailors that hawk their services}. Out of curiosity I opened a pillow to see the type of fillings used that made it easy to wash and fast to dry; It was white fiber material, no wonder! I now wash my pillows.

Laundry is one of the tedious and timing consuming chores at home, especially in a large family. Back home, washer men and women are hired by people who can afford it. Now, washing machines are taking over , but the epileptic supply of electricity still makes it difficult to use the machines often. Some have heavy duty diesel generators that can power the machines, but at what cost? Hence, many still employ the services of dry-cleaners and washer wo/men. Some wash everyday, weekly or bi-weekly, depending on their lifestyle and size of family.

Have a blessed week ahead.