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Saturday, April 05, 2014

OVER-SABI !

I have tried to avoid marriage talks for quite a while  now because everybody ... I mean EV-ERY-BO-DY have become an expert on it...hey! That reminds me... @ilola wrote a post on it a year ago...let me go and search for it ... and I dis-agreed with her ... me and that gal ehn! But with what I read all around now, I am wrought to agree with her o! I knowww, she would be grinning with that 'I told you so look!
More-over, I remembered advising a complaint who was in  DV marriage to move out and an anonymous made a comment that; 'Me that is managing my own marriage, am telling someone to move out'. I knew it was someone that read my post on the challenges I faced in my inter-religious and inter-tribal marriage and how I overcame them. Thus, a good friend advised me to keep my affairs offline, which I adhered to. But a friend came visiting and she said something, that I decided to say a little ... just a little ... a teeny little thing about marriage .


source


I prepared Iyan and ogbono soup for lunch and served it on the dinner- table, but as I was bringing the bowl of water for washing hands, she said jokingly; 'Stop it! Let your hubby stand up and wash his hands at the sink'. I replied jokingly; 'I was not home-trained like that, as you give water for drinking, you also give for washing hands.'I knew she meant well, and having stayed abroad for over a decade, she saw such thing as 'servitude'. But the truth my people is that, her husband likes the way I serve food whenever they come visiting because, she does not do that for him. If I was an Iyawo {new wife} I might have listened to her. This is why I have always said that, people should never, ne-e-e-ver, take anybody's marriage as a yard-stick for measuring theirs or see any married couple as a role model!

Some women have this over-sabi attitude in other people's marriage. For the fact that their spouse accept certain behaviour from them, it does not mean that they should super-impose it on other women and when their advice is not taken, they cuss out such women ... I remembered I was called docile and lazy years back when Sting did an interview with me ... but such women could be taking worst bull -s*** and craps from their husbands that they would never tell anybody! Abi, you want them to be a laughing stock as they have laughed at others chei? So to the Iyawos and brides-to-be who might read this post; My $2million advice is that; Simply KNOW your spouse and DO whatever you can to make yourself and marriage happy. SHIKENA!
OK! I don talk my own finis!



P.s; I tried finding @ilola old post, but couldn't.
P.s.s; @ilola, if you manage to read this post, please paste the link will you? Gracias.
P.s.s.s;Sting, if you manage to pass by my blog, kindly paste the link will you? E se o.


OK! Off to fry my puff-puff now! Have a lovely weekend :D
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