Thursday, March 16, 2017

WHY WIVES FIGHT MISTRESSES?

Many times, wives are asked; 'Why fight your husband's mistress, why not your husband? 'Did she asked your husband to have an affair with her?' Whenever I come across such comments from women, I am wrought to ask ; 'Why do husbands fight their wife's' lover when caught huh? IMO, they are tress-passers, and we know tress-passers are never welcomed! And who say wives don't deal with their way-ward husbands huh? You don't live with them, do you? Straying wives are sent packing, but way-ward husbands are forgiven, because, whether we like to admit it or not ... it's the man's world, since they are the ones that marry women, and can marry many wives as they want, according to our culture and their religion! 



source

The adulterous men say they are in it for the sex, while the mistresses say, it is for the money. BUT! These mistresses soon fall in love with the men because of the way they spend on them and their 'maturity' at handling situations! BUT! Many of these wicked men deprive their family needs to take care of their mistresses, also leaving their nasty personality at home, while showing their awesomeness to their mistresses who are no longer content with being the 2nd fiddle! THEY WANT IT ALL! So, they begin to scheme on how to overthrow the lady of the manor! Some go fetish, some use sexual prowess and some  food, to tie the man down, after finding the weakness of the wives from the diarrhea infected mouths of their lovers! When wives complain, people will say; No husband can be stolen unless he wants to be taken, in the first place! And you know what? They are kind of right! Simply because these men will tell their mistresses that they were forced to marry their wives, or are not in love with their wives or their wives are old or ugly or dirty or don't know how to f***! 

There is always the fly on the wall, that goes buzzing to the wives! Or the wives develop detective skills overnight, and find out things by herself. If many wives show you some of the things these mistresses write to their way-ward married lovers, you will be ashamed on their behalf! I read one, where the mistress was begging her lover to divorce his wife, that she loves him so much and she was ready to take care of his children! What of a mistress swearing brimstone and fire on her married lover when she found out he slept with another girl? I also saw the naked picture of a lady sitting on a chair with her legs wide apart showing what her mama gave to her! I heard she got married about 2 years ago, and still asks her ex-married lover for money! And yes, we do have a good laugh!

We have heard many stories of way-ward husbands coming back to their senses after years of neglecting or abandoning their families for their mistresses, and people still ask , 'Why fight the mistresses?  For the simple reason that;  after wives have turned to prayer warrior, a fashion-guru, a chef,and become an acrobatic in the bedroom, for their husbands to be faithful to them, the mistresses don't want to let go, because of the MONEY! And you expect wives to fold hands akimbo and be looking abi? WHOSAI! Some crazy wives will go spiritual or physical on them! Werey, pass werey!


source
The summary of it all is that ... it hurts and it is a reflex action to lash out at anything or anybody causing that hurt! In fairness to all mistresses, some way-ward married men, lie about their marital status. Many Nigerian men no longer wear their wedding rings, or takes it off when going 'hunting'. Many are good at keeping it from any web-search, and when the ladies find out, it will be too late because they are already deep into the relationship to let go! Shame on such irresponsible husbands! And some ladies no send sef, if a man is married or not! Wetin concern agbero with overload?! Money for hand, back for ground! 


What behooves me is the way, single and married ladies who are/were in adulterous relationships in the past or present boast about it and laughs at karma as a piece of mythical bull s***! And they ask, 'why karma don't visit adulterous men?' And I always reply; Who told you, it does not?


Friday, March 10, 2017

I AM A SAINT!

HEAR! HEAR! HEAR!

I am now a saint!

SHIOR! How come?

Yes oo, I am now a MRS! 

E-HEN! Tell me something!

I will oo, ko easy rara! {it's not easy}.

SO! What happened to the days of 'frolicking; with married men?

Oh! Please! Those are yester-years, now I am a new being!

I see! Just like that? Because you now have a ring?

Abeg! Let me hear word! You better pass me? Abi you married as a virgin?

At least I did not share it with a married man!

Sin is sin jor! Who thief, who kill, all na the same thing!

 Not so oo, karma will come visiting you!

I hear! It is only women address karma know abi? Men nko?#yimu#

It's the man's world, they make the rules!

If karma will visit me, it means I was the other woman's karma!

It does not work like that, many women don't have fish brains!

You are now abusing me? Is it your body? Who made you a judge?#hiss#

No, oo. Just saying that, for a single lady to give her virginity to a married man and have several abortions for him, she has cotton wool for a brain! 

LISTEN! If you know, you don't have anything good to say or congratulate me on my new acquired status, kindly keep that mouth of yours shut!

HA! It is you that is cussing me now o. If you know your conscience is clear, why go on the defensive? All I know is that when your own husband starts being a generous donor to other ladies, don't  grind your teeth out of anger or send sob stories to social platforms, simply take it in your stride.

Please, just carry your self-righteousness out of my sight! It takes 2 to tango!

Who told you the married men don't get burnt by their actions? Don't women pass another man's child to them? Don't they eat food cooked with menstrual blood for them? Don't their own wives cheat on them? Don't they drink water used for washing the vagina first thing in the morning? Don't they stop progressing in their business and career? Don't they become lonely and neglected by their children and wives at old age? Just that every married woman's worst nightmare is the 'other woman', because we know what our fellow specie can do to lasso a man down if he is loaded in his pockets and below the belt.

Hissss, all these epistle for what nau? Karma no dey look face? Virgins that have way-ward husbands nko? Do they deserve it?

Is cheating only physical? Emotional cheating nko?  Collecting money from a married man meant for his children's school fees or family feeding is equally wrong! As you said, karma no dey look face? Mistresses no dey fear face? Witch pass witch o!

Abeg, abeg, Ms sanctimonious, carry your wahala dey go. I serve a merciful God. Afterall the thieves on the cross still made heaven at the last hour! Make I go meet my circle of saints o jare!

SMH! Will women ever learn? They are always left with the towel hanging!  SIGH!

Saturday, March 04, 2017

NETFLIX

A comedian once made a joke about the people who rate movies in Netflix; He cannot imagine someone that can only afford $8.99 a month, rating movies, 2 stars? 3 stars? Well, it was a show organised by Netflix, so it made a good laugh. But it is from jokes your friends will tell you, who you are or what they think about you. I like and enjoy Netflix a lot, because of no advertisements, and their movies are well picked. I usually select comedies and foreign movies, it is there I understood the jibe the comedian made ... foreign movies get 2-3 stars especially Africa movies!


source. 2 THUMBS UP


I applaud Netflix for adding Nigeria films amongst their selection. The first time I saw it, I was so excited and watched all, and  always searched for 'recently added' movies, and I found one today, which I am watching right now ; ' Onye Ozi' ... Okey Bakassi is not disappointing me at all. My first time watching an Igbo movie, the only little comma I have is that, the white actors should have spoken English, the Igbo no flow at all 😃. It is said, we should give honour to whom it is due and when it is due, so I won't hesitate to hail Nollywood for improving because I am not a big fan of our movies. But, after watching the likes of Irapada, Figurine, Mr&Mrs, October Ist and The wedding party recently in You tube, ( the food scene was hilarious but knowing how Nigerian wedding parties are, especially for  the rich, the amala , gbegiri and ewedu with assorted meat looked 'poor 😄 ), I salute our producers and wish Netflix will be adding more of these well scripted movies. I grew up as a Bollywood fan, but as I became older, I got tired of the 21/2 hours long movies ... the songs and the new 'modern-whats-not', I liked the traditionally setting more.


source


I am happy that some Nolly wood movies don't have several parts again! And no long boring dialogues and exaggerated scenes! The movie has ended ...rated it 4 . BTW, What does Onye Ozi means sef? That is how I watch Indian movies without knowing the meaning of the titles! 😄 Ok, guys, see you later...going back to bed, leaving for work in the next few hours. Talking of work, a co-worker jokingly said, all normal people ought to be asleep by 3.00am! AHAHAHA.

Have a fulfilled week ahead.

Saturday, February 25, 2017

A SHOULDER TO LEAN ON.

Hubby was telling me last week how a colleague of his showed so much appreciation for the advice he gave to him. This colleague always complained of severe abdominal pain, which he said, has been going on for a long time, and he had visited the hospital, nothing was found after scan and test carried out. The last option was to insert a microscopic camera through his esophagus into his stomach to know what ails him. It was the cost of it that made him refused because his insurance said they won't pay!


'It might be appendicitis'  My hubby said, which another co-worker agreed. He went ahead to tell him about my cousin, blackky, who experienced similar thing, and the hospital continued treating her for typhoid and malaria. My mum had to rush her to a clinic close to our house when she was in excruciating pain.The doctor said, she needed to be operated on immediately because it was appendicitis! If you see how ripe this thing was ehen?! Thank GOD for using that doctor o! It would have raptured on her way back to school! Wetin my mum for talk? Her late sister's only daughter? GOD be praised! The colleague was reluctant because, he believed the experienced doctors he visited could not go wrong. But my hubby and the other co-worker, persuaded him to see a different doctor and suggest that it might be appendicitis.


He did not come to work for some days, only for him to resume last week, and told hubby, he was right. He was operated on immediately, that it remained a little for it to rapture! He would have been 'past' now, if he had delayed! And he said, that is why it is good to share your problem, because you don't really know who has the right solution to give. It was this same way, a Nigerian man knew he had sleep apnea.


He is right, but not in 9ja sha! Share your problem ke? Make dem use am cuss you later abi? NO WAY O! Me, myself and I  will be the only ones to know! This 'I-don't-want-people-to-know-my-problem-mentality, is so ingrained in us, that, even our leaders don't share any important personal info with us, unless forced to, and they give us half story! Regardless they are 'servants' of the masses, dem no send! Abi, make the 'witch' that caused it in the first place begin to gloat and finish what 'they' started? LAI LAI O!
source


Please don't blame us oo, because many will start using the problem as a yard stick to measure theirs and make comments like; 'Ha! Thank God ooo, my own is even better than this person sef!' Tell me, you think the person will be happy to hear that? Making he/she to feel bad? Many times, when I read some comments in blogs concerning certain issue, I just sigh! Females are the worst at doing this! Hence, many women bottle up their problem and fall into depression! Even in blogsville, many bloggers keep very important info from the ears of the public, regardless being anonymous or not. There is no human being on earth that does not go through a certain phase in their lives that will try their endurance and faith! When there is a shoulder to lean on, it helps to make the 'load' easier to carry until one throws it on the ground with a resounding thud!


I am a sharer. Many of you reading my blog for a long time knows I wear my heart on my sleeves which has helped me to handle difficult situations, and makes me feel better which is good for my well-being. Many people have developed high blood pressure because of the fear of sharing. The truth my people is that, sometimes you cannot do it alone...you need help....  no man is an Island.The thumb of the rule is that, don't share what you know will hurt you so bad or cause colossal damage, when it gets 'outside'. Simply apply wisdom.  Issues concerning health, faith, finances and relationships can be shared, because absolutely nothing is new under the sun! Also, don't commonize or look down on anybody ...  some people have vast wealth of knowledge because life has thrown 'lemons' at them, that they have learned to make 'lemonade' out of it. 

Peace out!



Sunday, February 19, 2017

GENDER EQUALITY IN NIGERIA.

I wanted the dust raised by the gender equality argument in Nigeria to calm down before I throw in my own 2 cents into the coffers. It has been argued that the bill is not about physical and biological equality, rather socio-eco-political. OK! We then agree that men are stronger, because we want them to change the car tires, open that jar of prickles, lift heavy items,  and go to wars right? Just as we know they have no business in getting pregnant and having PMS, yes? What we want is equal wages for the same jobs, to be governors/presidents, and to able to take major decisions without their consents, abi?

Then why do we tell them; 'Be a man!' Or 'You are a man, or walk like a man? Because we have high expectation from them! I have not talked about money yet ... many women are breadwinners in their household, and some earn far more than men, but deep down, they want the men to bore the major expenses in the home,or during dates. while they chip in. Valentine day celebration just passed, and women were expecting more from their husbands and boyfriends than what they were giving! I said it in an old blogsville interview when asked if there is equality between male and female? I replied NO.The insults that followed ehen? And I still stand on it!

Equality in a layman's understanding is 50-50 of ANYTHING and EVERYTHING! Our fore bearers fought for RIGHT TO WORK! RIGHT TO VOTE! And are still fighting for THE RIGHT TO HAVE SAME WAGES FOR THE SAME JOB DESCRIPTION! I am emphasizing on the word RIGHT, which is different from EQUAL! 'What is your point?' You might all ask? Simple! They picked their battles! 

Again, I ask, What are Nigerian women fighting for? In summary,they are fighting against inhuman or degrading treatment of women! Who does not like to be treated with respect huh? IF WE WOMEN DON'T RESPECT OURSELVES! THEN HOW DO YOU WANT THE MEN FOLK TO RESPECT US? 
Is it the nude pictures?
is it calling each other 'ho'?
Is it passing another man's child to another?
Is it betraying a friend's/sister's trust by sleeping with their husbands/boyfriends?
Is it fighting in public over a man?
Is it using 'bottom power' to get all juicy jobs/contracts/pass exams?
LADIES! RESPECT IS EARNED!IT IS EARNED! And the men have earned it in many ways! I can imagine, how the men might have laughed reading some of the issues raised in the bill,because they know, what our gender is capable of at the right price!

I know some might say, I am derailing off the track, that this is not what the bill was actually talking about! Really? You cannot address one and leave the other! NO MA! All are interlinked! OKAY! If not that, amongst we women, there is discrimination! Is it in the office? Or blogs? or Meetings? We shame the uneducated woman! We shame women that don't have economy power! We body-shame other women! 

Do you know the battles we should pick,that will get global attention? 
FEMALE GENITAL MUTILATION!
MEN NOT PAYING REASONABLE CHILD SUPPORT AND ALIMONY,
IN-LAWS TAKING PROPERTIES FROM WIDOWS!

I did not put up early marriage up there, because if a man approaches a family and say, I want to marry your 12 year old daughter , and they say NO, will he force them? They need enlightenment instead. I did not mention numerous wives because, it is fellow woman like you and I, that will gladly be a 2nd/3rd/4th/5th wife regardless of religious/cultural practice, because of greed and fame! I did not mention the slap-on-the-wrist-punishment given to adulterous married men because married women are also up in their neck in the act! I did not mention helping out with chores, because it depends on ones home training.

So, women, let us simply pick our battles one by one and gradually,we will get what we want...RESPECT and RECOGNITION for our important roles in the society.
Thank you and have a blessed week ahead.

Sunday, February 12, 2017

LOVE IS IN THE AIR!

Flowers are beautifully displayed in shopping outlets. This always happens in valentine and mother's day celebrations. And of course, there are the big teddy bears, chocolates, cards and strawberries coated with chocolates. Love is in the air! And women continue to complain, they are not appreciated? COME ON! Wait until you see father's day display!😃

A Nigerian elderly man once said, his daughter must marry a Nigerian in this obodo oyibo, because he does not want her to forget her root and the thought of letting her go with a 'stranger' to a different state or country he might not visit often, was scary.This was a hot discussion or should I say debate like 2 years ago, and I was with the school of tort that said; 'where ever she finds love and happiness, let her go', afterall, he brought another man's daughter to a foreign land! And technology is there to help him keep in touch with her. I understood his fear as a parent, but as a woman, I know we want to be with the man that makes our heart go ji-gi-di-ji-gi-di like Nigeria locomotive.😆

Anyways,last month, I heard that the man started singing a different tune when he attended a wedding where a Nigerian lady married a white guy, who happens to be divorced. Trust Nigerians nau, it became a topic for gisting, abi, gossiping, anything una like, call am ... infact, we should be holding talk shows! Why? He saw many Nigerian single ladies at the reception, wishing, they have husbands regardless of the race, and when some shared their experiences with Nigerian guys, they vowed not to have anything with them again, and are ready to marry oyibo or latino! It was then he knew how far!

I have been observing the dating scene here and come to understand why parents allow their children date early as when they are in high school. Watching hollywood movies in Nigeria then, I wondered why parents will allow their children go out on a date? This is because, the thunderous slap or severe beating Nigerian parents will give their daughter if a boy has the audacity to come to their house to ask to see her, is better imagined than experienced, 'you don spoil!' Will be the insult hauled at her! That is why teenagers do corner-corner love, until they are very old enough, which can be in their 20's if not 30's sef, to tell their parents they have a boyfriend. Some parents don't want to know , but expects you to bring in a man to show them, when they start asking, 'where is ya husband?' As if, you will just wave a magic wand ,... abra-ca-dabra, husband materializes! Same parents that were playing the ostrich before o!  Our 9ja parents! I throw-way q-bey hands for una oo!

It can be very cold and lonely, I tell you! Especially for people not with their families. The mind-your-business-attitude, and 'I-don;t-want-litigation-issues-later' don't allow socialization. It is in schools, work places and religious gatherings that people meet and interact ... sometimes ... and it ends as they walk out of the doors. Most people drive rather than walk, public transport is not common in some states, like, where I stay in Texas, it is in down-town you will see public transportation, only Uber operates in the city I live. Some don't like riding buses because they miss the time schedules, and waiting in the cold during winter and under the blazing sun during summer, is something-else! So, how will people meet? No wonder bars and clubs are the places you will see many people in the evenings.

In Nigeria, 'good girls and boys' don't go clubbing!😏  You can be 'toasted' in the bus or while waiting at the bus stop. Your neighbour's son can be 'scooping' you when passing the front of their house. Or your gangster mother can 'set-you-up' with each other. Or your 'naughty' friend can match-mate you with her brother. The list is endless, because, we live in a communal system, unlike here. So, if 2 teenagers like themselves in high school, since they won't graduate until they are 17-18 years, parents allow them go to dates with a chaperone or after the no-sex talk,  because, many marry their high school sweet hearts, after their college degree or immediately self! My neighbour married at age 19, while her hubby was 20 ... 19 years later, they are still together with 4 kids.

I was amused when a girl said she has a crush on my son ... a very tall and pretty girl. I asked my son, he was shy to admit it first, but, after much cajoling, he opened up too ... I told him, I am cool with it ... they can be friends ... when they both go to university ... who knows?😁 

HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY!💑

Monday, February 06, 2017

THE CHERRY-PICKING CHRISTIANS.

I do sometimes have a bible study with my children when we don't go to church. Last week, I talked about the 10 commandments, and as I read;'Thou shall keep the Sabbath day holy ....... I hesitated, because it brought back to my mind the question I had asked as a teenager then; If we all kept the Sabbath day holy, then who will be at the hospitals, police stations, fire stations, Electricity and water stations, and who will drive people to their various churches?

'Man was not created for Sabbath but Sabbath for man!' Jesus told the accusers of his disciples when they saw one of them 'working'.  Of course, I want to believe that we know that Sabbath was not originally on Sunday but Saturday right? And there is another perspective on what Jesus meant; we can decide whatever day we want our Sabbath to be ... Monday or Tuesday or Wednesday or Thursday or Friday! 

Why am I bringing this up? It is because I realized you and I have become 'cherry-picking-Christians'. We simply pick whatever scriptures that suits our lifestyles. But the scripture says, God'd word remains the same, yesterday, today and tomorrow! And, when we break one of the commandments, we are guilty of breaking the remaining 9! SO THERE!

I work on Sundays, likewise many essential services needed for human survival. But the scripture says ... not even our animals, or  slaves   should work on that day, we should rest, because GOD who created the universe rested on the 7th day after working for 6 days! 

So my brothers and sisters, before we start putting on our 'holy' garments because we don't wear jewelries, or wigs, or apply makeup, or tie  our hair 24/7, or don't have premarital sex, or never miss night vigil or whats-nots! WE ARE ALL SINNERS! YEP! You and I! So brethren let us pluck that our  a** down on a chair, and take a deep look into our souls and know that we are simply living by HIS GRACE and you ... yes YOU! (pointing) That will come and read this post and carry your nose up in the air like an 'aristocrat' and quickly walk out with your sanctimonious cloak flapping behind you, you need the word more! For HE said, I will show mercy on whom I choose to!

Shalom!

Wednesday, February 01, 2017

IN THIS NEW MONTH KE?!

I know it is too soon to write another post when the previous is just 2 days old, but I want to serve it hot and don't be putting my muse on hold again and lose her in the process. SO! Blackky my cousin called me yesterday;

Aunty o!

Yes!

You remember the former place una live before una travel comot chei?

SHIOR! Which kain question be that? Why I no go remember? Which year I comot sef? I even remember the first place where my parents lived when they moved to lagos sef! 

HA! HA!No vex! Your body too dey pepper you sha! 

Ahahaha, you no serious at all! Nah me you dey talk to like that? You know say, I for don twist that your mouth for you, suppose, you near me!

TAAA! I am a big girl now o!

Big wetin? E neva tey when I stopped changing your nappy sef!

AUNTYYY! HIAN!! E don do!

I hear! So whatsup?

Ehen-ehen, you know all those shop-containers inside and around the Estate?

Yes.

Them don they destroy all o! 

Say WETIN?

Yes oo!

I dey go badagry, when I see commotion every where as I pass mile 2. Then, I hear people dey talk say, govt wan come destroy containers na dey for near road, around the estate and inside sef. They don give them notice since, but they think say, ' na-as-usual', nothing go happen. Some come write petition when they know say water don pass garri...

Ehen-ehen?

...but dem no look their face! See wahala for everywhere o, I no fit take picture, I for send you.

NA WA! E mean say, my turkey customer cold room, the bakery and that popular evening supermarket will be affected ! OGA OOO! People's livelihood in this recession, gone just like that?

NA SO OO!

That was how houses,  hospitals, and schools were destroyed when they wanted to expand the road about 10 years ago, now this?

Na so we see am oo!

So, were will the traders go now, ehen?

Some go rent shop inside that rice market. Some, find where to put their load first.

SIGH!

We talked more, but I don't want to bore you guys. For those who don't understand all that jargon up there; My cousin was simply telling me that shops are being destroyed in the former Estate I lived before relocating, thereby making things more difficult for people.

I trust my country people, they will always overcome any hurdle on their lane! I am so concerned about my friend, whose shop was affected, after spending so much on renovation last year. I spoke to her yesterday after chatting with my cousin. It's well!

Sunday, January 29, 2017

THE MARKET WOMAN!

'STOP BEHAVING LIKE A MARKET WOMAN!' These words are usually used by Nigerians to cuss out people. I have not heard any Nigerian cuss out, with;'STOP BEHAVING LIKE A MARKET MAN! Why? It is because,men-traders are called business men! These words are used derogatorily because traders are loud, calling out to customers to patronize them, they quarrel with their neighbours if they tried to lure a customer away from them, and when offended they curse out using expletive words! And I wonder how this is different from what I read and see everyday in social media, amongst politicians, neighbours, friends and work places huh?

The Nigerian market woman is not respected ! But, many are mothers to graduates, millionaires, billionaires. celebrities,that  people wish to meet or marry! And some successful children are ashamed to mention their mothers sell/sold in the market! I see such children as ungrateful! Many have built successful business from scratch and are employers of labour! Many families today, are living off the legacy left behind by their mothers! An elderly woman in her 70's has a company that distributes goods, with graduates as accountant and sales reps! She said, she started selling under the bridge by 7up-Ijora (people living in Lagos will know there).

Nigeria markets are very busy and noisy because people from all walks of life visit there and you expect it to be without drama? WHOSAI! Even in boardrooms, quarrels do arise! Some clients or boss will download your life's history for you, if they are disappointed with your service or lost money in a business transaction! HUMPH! A friend said she visited her husband and he was in a meeting with his business partners, so she waited for him. She was surprised to see them shouting at each other, having a big quarrel, that she became worried, thinking the partnership was over! After a while, they came to an agreement and business continued as usual! How is that different from what we see daily in the market place? OH! Is it  because the market woman is not dressed spiffy and in a fancy building? I hear! With the flowing gutters, muddy ground, garbage strewn here and there, flies and rickety vehicles pumping out black smoke?  
source


Yes o! Even that tomatoes seller is someone's mother whose child can be a president tomorrow! INFACT! In this time of recession, the market woman is 'bae' now! She determines the price she wants to sell her goods, and you will buy by force by fire! You will be the one begging her to reduce price sef! She is the reason some homes can boast of a meal a day, because she sells on credit to them! She is a therapist to many women who feel comfortable unburdening themselves to a stranger who might not see them again for a while. They are more enlightened about the realities of life because they deal with all kinds of people and learn a thing or two from them.

The Nigerian market woman is a hardworking individual who against all odds strive to ensure her family don't go hungry and her children either learn a skill or get a university education to pave their own path in life. Hence, they should be accorded all respect because it is not easy all! 

My favourite market woman was the lady who sold soup ingredients. While grinding my ogbono/egusi or slicing vegetable, we would gist, together with other women waiting for their items. So tell, who is/was your favourite market woman and what do you talk about while waiting for your items? Infact, It was from a market woman I knew that 'the rich also cry!' (who remembered this old soap opera in the early 90's?😄)  Gracias! 




Monday, January 23, 2017

FAMILY IS BAE!

Hey! It's not too late to say HAPPY 2017! Right?  Who made new resolutions? I am not good at making and keeping any! I Simply make certain changes and try to be consistent. I took a long look in the mirror and decided that I will be a person of fewer words, but when I kept quiet people asked me if I was ok? Even my hubby gets worried when I don't reply back with a thousand words per seconds! AHAHA!

I observed that people talk more on topics that bothers them the most. For instance, Bollywood movies stress more on love-marriage because arranged marriage is part of their culture. Nolly-wood portrays our fetish side because voodoo is one of Nigeria problems! Holly-wood emphasis on family-bonding, because it is lacking here! While, I write more about entitlement mentality and our traditions, because it pisses me off!

I worked on Christmas, boxing day, new year eve, new year,and my birthday. I have to find a hidden spot to say my new year prayer whilst my husband and kids did theirs at home (first time in our family). Most times, work comes first, and the family bears the brunt. Remember, I told you guys how I asked for a night off to prepare my kids for their new day at school and my request was declined twice? I insisted, and, it was approved reluctantly! I was surprised, because I believed family came first!  A co-worker had to resign 3 weeks ago, when she could not cope leaving her children alone at night with her sibling. Her husband works in a different city. Before she started having kids, she did 3 jobs, now, she cannot cope with 1 because her family comes first!

I requested for 5 days off (it was quickly approved oo, so I can go with my wahala ... ahahha) to have quality time with my family ... only to fall sick! It was yesterday, I felt much better and went to church for the first time this year. It was refreshing; 30mins for worship, 1 hour for sermon, and back home by 12 pm! No paparazzi or whats-not! Being AS, I seldom fall sick, but when I do, you will see it in my eyes. Hence, whenever I complain of being sick, hubby knows, it is serious! He sees me as a super-woman! I have told him several times, I AIN'T ONE! Why will he believe when my previous and current wellness results says other wise huh? 

It amuses me when I see the surprise on people's face when my blood work results comes in. I am like; seriously? Because, I am plus size, then I will not be healthy? We are a product of our environment and lifestyle. We should all stop judging a book by it's cover! That was why I was surprised that this particular post got the highest traffic, for the fact that only one person commented! It's not always as it seems. This applies to every aspect of our lives.


my 2016 wellness result


I want to hear from you guys, will you choose work over family?
Thank you and have a blessed week ahead.

Tuesday, December 27, 2016

HAPPY NEW YEAR IN ADVANCE!

We went to my brother-in-law's house to celebrate the Christmas as we did last year because it has now become a 'tradition' in our family. They celebrate thanksgiving with us and we all go and celebrate the new year with another Nigerian family friend. 

How did this tradition come about? I seriously don't know! It just happened my sister-in-law came to help me bake my first thanksgiving turkey since I didn't know how to do it and we celebrated together, the next thanksgiving, I did it myself and invited them over to come and see it ... then I began inviting them with our mutual friends. They in turn invited us for Christmas when hubby told me I should not stress myself cooking when I was heavily pregnant for my son who is 3 years old today, so, they invited us over,  then we went again, and again ... our mutual friend celebrates her eldest son's birthday during new year, so we all go there ... now, it became a tradition! You see how certain traditions came about? And next generations will now hold strongly to it, likely adding their own and say, that is how our 'fathers' did it in the olden days ...  as some Nigerian cultures came about!


pounded yam

ogbono soup

jollof rice


We all chip in to make it less stressful for the hostess. Our mutual friend brings pepper soup, I prepare ogbono soup while my sister-in-law prepares jollof rice and pounded yam, and small chops. These are aspects we are each good at, which I believe life should really be about; Maximizing our good aspects to complement each other, be it in our homes or work places, and letting go of our flaws. 


New year is 4 days away, and we shall all cross over by HIS GRACE and MERCY through CHRIST our SAVIOUR.  This should be a moment of sober reflection by looking into the mirror and seeing who we really are and improving on ourselves. 
Take care everyone and see you all in 2017.




Sunday, December 11, 2016

SLEEP APNEA.

HA! First time to have a weekend off after 10 months! Instead of me to be catching up with all the sleep I missed during the week, I was tidying up the house! I have finished, watching Tv and my eyes fell on my laptop......
SO! I want to talk about sleep apnea! The first time I heard these words were the early months when I started working overnight and a Nigerian guy advised me not to do it for so long, because it has it effects! This guy suffered from Sleep Apnea, not related to working overnight o, he just mentioned it.

 He worked overnight for a long while before doing day job. It all started with the heavy snoring, that made his wife to either sleep in the parlour or use earplugs! And the gibberish he said when sleeping! Then he began falling asleep on the wheel during the day, that he would park in a gas station and nap for 10mins or more to clear his head. His wife began praying fervently, because they believed their village people were on his matter!

It was not until he gave a ride to his wife's friend, that they came to know what his problem was! The friend told his wife that his heavy breathing sounded like that of her cousin's who was later diagnosed to have sleep apnea, that he needed to go and see a specialist. His wife opened up to her, and his friend said her cousin flat-lined twice before they knew it was very serious! He went to see a specialist, after sleeping 2 days in the clinic under observation, he had narrow nasal passage and his sleep Apnea was severe!. A minor surgery was carried out to correct the nasal passage and the gadget was ordered for him to be sleeping with, everyday! He said, 'I slept like a baby, the first day, I used the mask, and woke up without a headache!' He does not snore heavily again or talk gibberish! But it did not come cheap! Medical ain't cheap here, bruhh!


source


It became a topic of discussion and we realized, this is probably what some people are suffering from, back home and we point accusing fingers ..... Many religious people will say,' NOT MY PORTION!' But the truth my fellow Nigerians, is that, not everything is spiritual! And atimes, it is good to talk about your pressing problem, because you don't really know who has the right info to give out. And never wave aside anybody as inconsequential! One word or one direction can save a life!

Have a blessed Sunday, y'all. 
P.s Christmas very close now...beautiful decorations everywhere. I might stop and take pictures one night on my way to work.
P.s.s..Lemme go and bake a cake then.